What IS the difference between being an empath and being empathic?

What IS the difference between being an empath and being empathic?

 

As a child I constantly heard that I was too sensitive and people were frustrated with me because I was emotional.  Sometimes I used to wonder why I was the only one crying and why other people weren’t crying!

Didn’t they feel the pain of the situation that was bringing me to tears?

Now I know, they did not feel what I felt.  It wasn’t until I was an adult and took myself for years of counselling that I discovered I had a natural ability to carry other people’s burdens.  I learned phrases like “empath”  and “burden-bearer”.  They may momentarily feel empathy for whatever the situation was, but they don’t actually take the feeling home with them, they don’t identify with it and struggle to find their own center again.

Are you a burden-bearer?

If you feel like you are carrying burdens, you are.

  •  News stories may affect you in such a way that you just can’t shake the feelings from them.  If you’ve been exposed to negative stories, they seem to linger and affect your mood.  It’s not as easy for you to shake those moods.  You likely avoid the news and don’t watch TV much.  As a child I was sometimes told to watch the news because it was important to be up to date on current events.  My poor mom had NO IDEA what this did to me until one day she noticed that I was standing watching a story about someone having died in an accident and tears were streaming down my face.  I was maybe 6 or 7 years old.  Thankfully, that was the last time I had to watch the news.  I do not watch the news to this day.

 

  • You suddenly are feeling really strong emotions about a person, a topic or something and it almost seems as if these are not even your opinions or feelings. It might even feel like something has taken over inside you.  You might be asking yourself, “Why did I say that?  Why am I feeling that? I don’t know I felt that…”  It feels like it’s just not yours and sometimes you wonder “Am I THAT permeable???”  (Yes, you are but it’s actually pretty easy to shift this…ask me how.)

 

  • People are always telling you you’re too sensitive or to toughen up.  I certainly heard that one a lot growing up. (…also…”crybaby” was my nickname for a few years)

 

  • You’re a pretty good listener and people seem to tell you their troubles all the time.  In fact, you frequently find yourself having phone conversations where you never actually speak after “hello”.  The other person talks until they stop and feel better.  Unless you have the energetic skills built to withstand this, you usually leave the conversation quite deflated and tired.

 

  • You may attract people who really suck your energy and you are not sure what to do about it.  Some people refer to this as “energy vampires” but I was always afraid of vampires as a child so I don’t use that term.  I’ve learned many ways to feel great even when I can’t remove that person from my life.  I can teach you how to do this too!

 

  • It feels like people are subconsciously picking up on how goodnatured you are and sometimes when you walk into a room you feel as though you’ve stepped into a thick soup.  Almost as though your primal fight/flight/freeze/faint response has kicked in. If people are stressed, you seem to feel stressed and don’t know quite how it happened.  If people are angry or frustrated, and you weren’t before you walked into the room, you feel off balance and have this urge to hide in the bathroom or something.   It may take time before you even become aware that all those feelings are NOT YOURS.  They’ve stuck to you like a burr in the forest.

 

It’s actually not that hard to find your center and stay there.  The hard part is remembering those negative feelings are JUST NOT YOU.  It’s not your fault and it’s a beautiful sign that your boundaries are being tested. You can master this, by the way!  There are nurturing ways to care for your gifts (yes, being an empath is a gift and not a curse) and it just takes practice.

Ask me how

 

Whining

Whining

“As we grow older, especially if we are outer-directed, it is not difficult to find more and more to whine about.  This poses a risk of a negative transformation into the archetypal martyr-mother.”

 

“She resisted the temptation to call me up and whine when confronted with the daunting task of unpacking and beginning a new life.  Instead she play-acted an exaggerated version of her whiner, with just herself as the audience, and then kept on with what had to be done.”  (Crones Don’t Whine by Jean Shinoda Bolen)

So I suggest taking time for yourself.

Sit.

Pray.

Meditate.

Laugh.

Eat food you love.

Watch the sun rise because it reassures you and is nourishment for your soul.

Moon gaze because it reminds you of the connections you have to stardust.

If you feel whiny I really think you just need more time to yourself.  Go inward.

What is AFT (Aroma Freedom Technique)

What is AFT (Aroma Freedom Technique)

AFT is a step-by-step process using essential oils to trigger a permanent shift in how we experience ourselves and the world.

AFT is a tool for clearing traumatic memory.  AFT is a tool for clearing blocks, negative memories and stressful memories. You do not have to believe in the process for it to work and be effective.

Introducing the aroma of specific essential oils at the right point in the process of recall can break apart this memory complex and thereby restructure the implicit learning connected with the memory.  Results are consistent with the most recent research on Memory Reconsolidation.

How does it work?  We use beautiful, healing essential oils as part of the healing process because essential oils affect the memory centers of the brain extremely quickly.

Memories that are stressful or traumatic are stored based on the feeling of the event, not on the details of the event.  The memory is stored as a complex of images/thoughts/feelings/body sensations.  Our emotional learning is based on this memory complex.  When specific essential oils are used at the right point in the process of recall, they can break apart a memory complex and restructure your connection with the memory.

Our conscious mind makes assumptions.  Our conscious mind assumes that the memory creating stress or trauma is the one we consciously present.  This isn’t always the case. With AFT we allow the unconscious mind to access our memories and present us with the events we may have forgotten or have not connected with our current concern.

AFT is an amazing tool to use as part of intuitive counselling.  We honor what arises in each session regardless of what it is.   Sometimes the events that are recalled seem unrelated but it’s the energetic imprint of that event we are healing.

What is energy medicine?

What is energy medicine?

Consider this:  We don’t HAVE energy, we ARE energy!

Your being consists of more than its physical presence.

Your experiences from babyhood and throughout your life are held in the memory centers of your brain AND ALSO as flowing or congealed energy in your physical, emotional and subtle energy bodies.

In other words, the stories of your life, your attitudes, beliefs and perspectives are held in the muscles and organs of your body AND ALSO those invisible energy fields emitted from your physical body called subtle energy bodies and auric bodies.

Everything gets stored!  The good stories and the not-so-good stories.

Sometimes the way we hold our stories and experiences causes us illness, stress, pain, depression, anxiety (and more…).  We can get caught in downward spirals.

In the past our technology wasn’t sophisticated enough to measure changes in our energetic system and now it is.  There are studies and courses focussed solely on the science behind the effectiveness of energy healing modalities like EFT, Reiki, meditation, acupuncture and yoga.  Increasingly, energy medicine is being recommended as a wellness tool for both mental, physical and spiritual health.

Energy medicine can look like:

  • a reframe of our stories
  • a combination of tapping on the meridians of the body while speaking about the things that are distressing you
  • the use of pure, potent essential oils to stimulate the limbic system (which is connected to the memory centers of the brain) to shift the way a memory is stored so it no longer causes you distress
  • a trance or guided meditation
  • prayer
  • mindfulness practices
  • the use of tuning forks touching our spine to stimulate the chakra centers
  • the use of entrainment to bring you to a healing breath rate through rhythm or vibration
  • hands-on healing
  • reiki
  • intuitive energy massage (which includes reiki, white light healing, chakra balancing, cranial sacral and gentle body pulling)
  • quantum touch
  • Body Talk
  • feathering your aura
  • aromatherapy
  • yoga
  • a long walk
  • acupuncture
  • massage
  • conscious speech
  • singing
  • toning
  • color therapy
  • crystal healing
  • a salt bath infused with organic, specially blended essential oils designed to bring balance to your chakra system
  • space clearing
  • the practice of feng shui

Energy medicine practitioners and energy healers are trained in their respective modalities.  They can help you very quickly bring awareness to the energetic sources of your distress, illness, frustration, painful emotion.  Sometimes your awareness is unnecessary.  Sometimes the healing work can be done remotely.  Sometimes just your willingness to show up and allow your healing guide to work their magic by bringing peace to your physical and energetic systems is all is takes.

I have been learning, training and practicing energy healing for years.

If you would like support to bring healing to some aspect of your life, give yourself permission to ask for help and to be well, whatever that looks like for you.

Connect with me by email (below).

What I Really Think About Law of Attraction

What I Really Think About Law of Attraction

Have you ever had days like this?

So…I’m wondering if you’ve ever experienced LOA working even when you were not feeling positive?

We hear all about this in the manifestation world/business/goal achievement world that you must feel good for the LOA (law of attraction) to work in your favour.  Hmmmm….I don’t thing so.

I’ve noticed in my life that it’s visualization and time spent in quiet envisioning my miracles, hopes and dreams and NOT the emotions from day to day that seem to make things happen.

I have soooo many experiences of this that I do not believe how we feel day to day really even matters.
It’s how we picture and live in that picture and REALLY FEEL that we are in that image we create.  THAT’S where the feelings matter.

Negative day to day feelings don’t matter nearly as much as seeing ourselves succeeding even with the negative feelings.

I guess if Law of Attraction really is a law then it doesn’t really matter what I think!  It’s going to work it’s magic in my life regardless.

Intention, intention, intention…that’s where the gold is.

Inspirata Collective

Inspirata Collective

Dear Beautiful Friend,

I have had this creation living in my mind since 2013.

It’s called Inspirata and it’s a collective of women who create purpose in their lives and prosperity in their work through staying super-connected to spirit.

This spiritual foundation, our connection with our innermost self and our connection with our eternal self, is actually THE thing that feels most important to us.

It’s our sanctuary. It’s the nest we seek to replenish and find solace.
It’s what allows us to thrive as we serve our clients, our patients, our students, our customers, our families and our friends.

I let go of my Inspirata idea when my life changed and I found myself single (again) living on my own, navigating a divorce and trying to figure out how my life was going to work.

All my energies went into survival.

I don’t know that it was the right move, to be honest, putting all my energies into survival instead of creativity. Maybe if I’d continued on with my creative ideas then, that whole transition might have been a little easier on me. Maybe not.

What I do know is that I have many more skills and inner resources now because of that transition time. As you know, I’ve used essential oils as part of the last bit of my emotional recovery this last year. This gathering is not about the oils though.

This is about our spirits, desires, plans and lives having more power and impact when we create (at least in part) as a collective.

During January 2018’s super-blue-blood-lunar-eclipse I felt a huge surge of energy to bring people together. It kind of took over actually…to the point that I found myself on Vistaprint making invites and cards for this and not knowing how to actually get it all going with dates and place and what I would offer to you exactly.

Because the surge of energy was so purposeful, I didn’t want to not do it.
I really wanted to DO it. So I did it.

And it was beautiful!

 

Now…I’m inviting you to be part of the next Inspirata Collective gathering.

I envisioned these circles as a kind of celebration. Together we create space to create clarity in some area of our lives or business.

Relaxed, supportive, gentle gatherings with the potential for healing and understanding. Experiences that uplift your sense of self, support prosperity and nurture a sense of thriving in life.

Our first gathering was during the full moon in March on Friday, March 2 at my home in the afternoon.  The full moon considered a cosmically impactful time to release that which you no longer need.

These gatherings are not yet regular but if you’d like to be included in the next one, please let me know.

I would love to see you here.

with love!
Susan
xox